My time is not more important than anyone else’s time…but it IS important to me. When I get a day off work and my homework and housework is caught up, I get to choose what I am going to do with my free time.
Normally, I would prefer to watch whatever show I’m binging on Netflix, or curl up with a glass of wine and a good book. If I can’t make the trip to go see my best friend due to time constraints or lack of funds needed for gas prices, I try to reach out to friends I haven’t seen in a while.
I recognize that we all have crap going on in our lives, I’m an adult and I can handle being told that. What I can’t handle is being told that we can make plans and then getting blown off with no explanation. What’s worse is when that friend whines and complains about not having a life and never has anything to do. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!? Might as well just kick me in the gut and then turn your heel over my heart as soon as I hit the ground.
I’m so tired of being the one who reaches out and tries to make the plans. I’m tired of never being important enough. I’m tired of being taken for granted…neglected until I’m needed and then forgotten again.
I’d really like to tell you that some day, you might reach out and I won’t be there to catch you when you’re falling…I won’t be there to pick up your pieces and hug you back together. But the truth of the matter is that my heart is too big to be that cold. No matter how many times you break mine, I’ll still help you heal yours. And I’ll do it every single time you need me – even when you refuse to take responsibility for your part in my anger and heartache.